january nine 2

it's my mom's birthday on sunday and as my husband's grampy says, despite the passing of years, it's hard to get over the death of a parent. recently, i come into contact with my aunt's e-mail written after mommy's funeral, talking about parenting perfection. nobody's a perfect parent. my mom certainly was never hands-on but her style made us proud. when she got angry, she seldom softened. she never took much notice about other people's opinion, no pretensions. she seemed to know every trivial aspect of pop culture, her classmates and friends, her relatives, geography. she attended all our PTA meetings, helped me buy clothes until she had her stroke when i was 22. it would probably be mean to say that the stroke was a blessing because with that, she stayed home, less gallivanting, more reading. but when dad passed away, i could discern the restlessness but not the heat stroke that triggered the infarction. she was so well-loved by her friends that even until a year ago we have more good housekeeping magazines than we can afford to bind.

i miss her. but that's expected. her grandchildren may not able to experience first hand her many wonderful qualities, hopefully all of us her kids, would live up to her ideals.