countdown to new year

happy new year!

the dizziness factor

my middle brother tied the knot yesterday at 2pm Philippine time in a wedding replete of trimmings of a full entourage including an arrhae bearer. i couldn't sleep a few hours before or after that, i had the worst dizziness possible which made me snooze during daytime. my whole month is all about nausea and dizziness. i'm mostly horizontal and feeling sick (more about that later?).

i asked my youngest brother to take pictures and he said yes. aside from him, three of my cousins were part of the entourage; meg, cheche and jovelle (joseph). i don't know them well. i'm the oldest cousin from both sides of the family. they're like a generation behind, the internet, cellular phone generations.

i was trying to ring the youngest brother during the reception, it was out of the coverage area, in a hotel right at the center of Bacolod. i had coverage in nowheresville Oxford or Kent or Cambridgeshire during one of those Spurs weddings. hours after the celebration, my youngest brother e-mailed me that since he was the best man, he couldn't take photographs. not even from his table, not even at any time?

i was mulling over the fact that i should have asked our helper. she could have done me and my brother Butch a favor. i can't talk to tita Kay on the phone. maybe i should have widened my family net and include others i don't see anywhere growing up. or go home and organise a family reunion without the chutzpah, just full of humility? or loosen the purse strings a little and distribute a few gifts?

if only mommy is around.

advent calendars on display

regular Lego advent calendar



star wars Lego advent calendar

I'm totally hopeless in abstract reasoning examinations. Ditto with Lego parts and pieces. I couldn't connect the tiny dots. Kudos to the hubby for helping me out with the snowmobiles, yoda as Santa Claus and just about everything.

let's see

i don't feel well, nauseous as ever, bed bound, almost fainted from the smell of steaming rice. until now, i could still smell it. it's a horrible physical feeling. goodness, my olfactory system is on high drive at this very point. i can't decipher what my husband is cooking, simply too strong.

it's almost the day of the solstice, almost Christmas day. the dark days are almost over and i couldn't be happier. i couldn't attend any of those soirées, much less perform any useful task like our household ironing.

gtg, dizzy, dizzy, dizzy.

i like the house

death is a serious issue. taking care of a child is a serious issue. this is like three men and a baby but much darker. we go through predictable romcoms and montages, and life is hardly reflected in romcoms and montages.

the mansion, with the huge kitchen, what an American dream. both the towering protagonists have their great jobs. i particularly enjoy looking at the cakes and muffins.

discovery

the director is an enjoyable read.  this blog has been in existence for almost a year. i just recently read through the entries. i like the older blog as well, i re-read once in a while.

meanwhile, as i overthink

and lie in bed to quell the apparent queasiness, i struggle with bedsores, almost chest infection and the likes, then a feeling of inadequacy surfaces. this sense of underachievement never leaves us, it's always lurking behind the curtains. this essence of self being crushed by pity invites and fair weather friends should never affect our confidence. some people are just jerks, period.

with that notion, not in view of my Facebook news reels, is actually a good thing. not to take anything away from mark zuckerberg's invention, familiarity really breeds a lot of contempt. it's all about the pictures. blogs, with more than 240 characters, is nothing but a farfetched idea.

what's the point of reading?

nauseating week

the title is kind of literal. i've been nauseous the entire week. like today for instance, my bed is my sanctuary. i didn't particularly get up. it's better to have a rest.

now for some due realisations, finding friends, such a tricky thing to do. who are our real confidantes in the world? i'm planning on cutting a few Christmas presents and future birthday cards. it saves money and emotional investments.

looking at the bright side, if we're not invited to the wedding or birthday party, we don't have to procure gifts, that surely helps our piggy banks.

roosters

picture from more than three years ago.

be stress free

have to stay away from annoyances the next few months or perhaps forever. how to accomplish that, is draped in nothing but mystery. this is winter time for F sake. i can't stand the crowds in the lifts, the slow movements, the propensity for gossip, the cruel jibes from a few acquaintances, the childish scrawls, the hollow pursuit of competing with others, etc.

yes, not a lot of people have read desiderata.

this world is full of complications. what annoys me doesn't affect those who cherish certain things like i don't know, embracing the old clique.