before the clock strikes 12

another gift from the in laws.

my time and real time.
i set my clocks 45 minutes in advance.

web page

on with the new

calendar

2011

rolling

my year in movies is a huge stinker. my year in straight plays, magical. my year in booking GP clinic appointments, pathetic. my year in parties, lunches and dinners, on my terms and standards, great. we will get older next year, i wish for more travel, more savings (how we're going to accomplish that with 20% vat increase and pay increase freeze is deflating). i want to have the december holidays off next year, if some lucky mortals can get away with that, why not me? COYS!

colour

it's fantastic when in-laws hand out presents.

two movies

On Christmas Day we viewed two films featuring Woody Harrelson on Sky. There was the Roland Emmerich epic 2012, doomsday, apocalypse saga CGI-laden with John Cusack and Chiwetel Ejiofur. After the roller coaster adventures of devastating earthquakes, volcanic eruptions and tsunamis, all I could think of was how did I miss Ejiofur's performance as Othello at the Donmar in '07?
I wasn't able to start nor finish Zombieland. Jesse Eisenberg's always channel the cute geek. Emma Stone seems everywhere and Bill Murray has a nice mansion. It reeks of Shaun of the Dead, set in America rather than England.

bi-cultural love

there's a speech in the other end of the line that goes something like this, although you pretend to be an american, it's important to note that you are not an american, or something to that effect. i couldn't muster a direct quote. but that monologue could have been targeted to my younger self who was beguiled by the american pop culture. i'm no longer as naive. i've explored other ways of thinking. by virtue, watching other cultures study in depth the differences between sarah michelle gellar and sarah jessica parker, elicits a little surprise. growing up embracing hollywood, such confusion did not exist. we just know.

bumping into this movie accidentally though, is like getting lobotomised, part of the drill in the time wasting orbit of the romcoms. the gags are not that funny and reeks of a painful realization that a brown non-caucasian despite being adorned in jewelries is more or less the maid, as reflected in the ivy league-blonde antagonistic behaviour.

dreaming of pie's cupcakes

the morning after the cheers

it's just my husband and me for all the holiday merriment. do i say that every year? i'll read back the pages later.

that's our tradition. with christmas telly in the background, he cooks dinner, i clean the kitchen. he drinks the wine, i pour my glass-full in the sink, wasting money in the time of recession. we open our presents. now what is christmas without opening the presents? i got my flattering full length mirror yesterday. it's very respectful towards its subjects, doesn't make me look as fat as i feel or as all the photographs suggest.

as i peer through all the conventional christmas dinner party pictures, with all the fancy trimmings, feastive food and family, or to us in the diaspora, the community, the circle of friends, i prefer my tradition. for my reclusive spirit and the sensitivity chip, it's a lot less scathing, a little more to my tune.

lego advent calendar

all done.
happy holidays!

day photos

card line

they're mostly from my husband's side of the spectrum, his family, friends and colleagues. i know the mass production of paper hastens deforestation but the thought that counts mantra warms the heart. my work mates on the other hand mostly feel the humbug, no parties, no secret santas. thanks to my brothers for the greetings and presents, and all the friends that texts and greeted on facebook. i still have notes i haven't posted for the very few loveable people in this dimension. i'll get to them by february.

still awake

it's three minutes 'till the clock strikes 12, at least in my phone. i'm about to jump into the bath after working deep into christmas eve. christmas dinner won't be till tonight. after five years, it has ceased to be odd. two souls, more cheers, lots of presents, flickering lights, slippery pavements, outdoor frost. christmas is a moment of rumination, digging into the core of kindness. speak softly, whisper gently.

frozen christmas

not white or blanketed in snow but slush.

it's all slush these days, like mud in the in the rough roads of the third world where i was born and bred. during the sub zero chill, all the puddle turns into ice. it's grim, like the queue at heathrow and the hundreds of souls sleeping rough at the terminals.

card thanks

It has never happened to us (me and hubby) before, getting a thank you note through well-crafted blogs of two highly-talented individuals, Ry and Bo. In this age of unanswered texts and e-mails, unacknowledged presents, it feels marvelous to be appreciated. There are tons of portals for everybody around for connection -- facebook, forums, e-mails, texts, phone calls. Or the post office, not so reliable during the snow and Christmas period, but any other time of the year, the royal mail delivers on time, or not depending on how eager one is for the parcel or letter. During this frozen Britain December, there could be a bit of delay . Patience is key.

Definitely blogs are special. It’s great to be mentioned by two of my favorite people. Hope to see you soon Bo and Ry. Happy Christmas!

virgin snow

it's not too bad out there.
we had to walk a mile for food.
now i have million things to do.
almost a white Christmas.
please, don't derail the trains, let people go to work.

gongs

the SAG awards nominations are pretty quite similar to the Golden Globes with a few distinctive exceptions. first, there's no lea michele amongst the nominees. the supporting and lead categories in comedy are truncated into one list and her shrill, annoying rachel berry didn't make the cut. and it would have been wonderful if jim parsons and the big bang theory ensemble were able to sneak into the select compendium. but the actors guild opted to go with single-camera comedies. my choices may not sometimes matter in the grand scheme of the universe but they're my choices.

there are also some actors who are almost always nominated or who choose projects with keen precision, or who are simply talented. amy adams is maybe all that and more, quite the ubiquitous performer. maybe i will catch the fighter just for her (and christian bale).

trophies, comedy, champagne

black swan
the social network
the king's speech

the good wife, the big bang theory, glee. lea michele, julianna margulies, hugh laurie, jim parsons.
i can live with that.

though the fun would be ricky gervais hosting, slugging off slebs in front of their faces, hilarity for the masses.

about parents

Everybody's Fine starring De Niro and familiar faces as his kids (Kate Beckinsale, Sam Rockwell, Drew Barrymore) remind us or specifically me that children are always closer to their mothers than their fathers. A retired hard worker who a few months ago lost his wife, De Niro traversed the continental US touching base with each of his offsprings, uncovering white lies and realising that as adults they confided to their mother while keeping him in the dark about their lives and careers. It's a nuanced performance from De Niro, miles away from Meet the Fockers, far removed from The Godfather 2.

As its premise, the film's overall quality is no great shakes. But it tells the truth, men are not into pussified emotions, we should know that by now. Or they're not men? It's that bit of black and white.

From my experience, Filipino men may have no qualms singing Barry Manilow. But for hard core Englishmen, that's a no-no.

However, most cultures gallivant towards the Oedipal features of existence. We confide to our mothers or mother figures our deepest problems and secrets. While daddy is there to give us our allowance.

It's true in a way as fathers, in the history of time are the breadwinners in the basic family unit. In my family growing up, my mother may have her weaknesses, but her wide intellectual scope was the powerful tool in providing us with structure. Nonetheless, fathers are not way less important, by virtue of being fathers and being there, they not only build the foundation of our future but empower us for the challenging times ahead.

the heavy walk home

panting.
debilitated.

two belgos

chalk farm

covent garden

frosty the view

still at the dam.

resolute

how to be a patient soul and all the kaek-ekkan is hard to surmise. what's with not clicking reply to the letters? granted every single person on earth is stressed. ta'da.

to shop, to flip

in order to avoid the ennui of 24 hour news channels at Bronckhorst and the not so good idea of not bringing Catch 22 in between flights, i picked up a copy of Elle US and began flipping. the fashionable ads seem more fascinating than the articles, LV has four pages, Gap with Joan Smalls has two, Gucci has two, Clinique has the prescription to even skin tone. Georgia May Jagger is the face of Chanel. the girls of Lancome have two pages each, Penelope Cruz for Tresor, the fragrance; Kate Winslet for l'absolu rouge, vintage red lipstick collection and Julia Roberts for the teint miracle makeup. Fendi watches, Gucci eau de parfum, Guess, Maybelline New York mascara. Julianne Moore for Bvulgari, Audrey Tatou for Chanel no. 5. William Rast joining forces with Target, for a limited time. Eva Longoria millionizing her lashes for L'oreal Paris. Christy Turlington for Roberto Coin. Heide Klum for Ann Taylor. Twirl, a new fragrance from Kate Spade. Stella Tennant campaigns for H & M.

Kate Moss promotes David Yurman. Madonna for D & G. skipping a few more spots like DKNY, CH, Bulova watches, Juicy Couture, Bebe. Banana Republic has fantastic winter wraps. we can see the likes of Charlotte Gainsbourg for Balenciaga Paris, Dianne Kruger for Calvin Klein Beauty fragrance, Lindsey Vonn for Rolex, Marion Cotillard for Dior, Halle Berry for Revlon makeup, Frieda Pinto for L'oreal hairspray, Maria Sharapova for Tag Hauer, young Karlie Kloss models for Lola, the fragrance for women by Marc Jacobs.

capitalism is well and truly great. can't afford all if not most of the hawked products. but their ad spaces modeled by well known ladies warm up the room amid the deep freeze.

the dam in december

chilly in amsterdam.

touch type

the downside to blogging through my phone touchscreen, i guess, is its slower publication process. but it's very convenient when it comes to the immediate replenishment of the page, handy rather than bulky to gain easy, fast access to confounding thoughts and insights.

and that is why we read texts, stories and articles, watch tons of movies, download videos, listen to music, in order to acquire a significant amount of knowledge and understanding of the other person's viewpoints and opinions.

when it comes to the flicks, have seen only two in the cinema this year. mostly i settle for sky movies and dvd's. should have i ventured outside my bedroom realm more and be awed by the wide screen experience? maybe. but there are other duties to attend, more important matters that need attention. i'll catch the social network on dvd, and same as another year by mike lee. black swan with natalie portman seems promising. i'll wait and see.

tiny droplets

very little snow in london last week. although it was freezing and the wind stung deep in the dermis, in my vernacular, gapanalupsop. after a calmer weekend, it's back to frost and fog, all week. more snow for the rest of the country in the coming days, though not in the capital.

fever hot

knocked out by the biting wind. i feel tremendously feverish. it's an awful, awful feeling where there's no comfort even in sleep, a cacophonic state where the basic human functions are such a pain. add a screaming, confused, though not his fault out of his mind work assignment, the result to my senses is ultimate torture. the psyche is powerful. i believe in the id and subconscious, subliminal entities that could reveal inner torments, when confused due to high amount of chemicals in the brain.

ice cream at the george

i like ice cream in winter despite the freezing spells though like any other hot blooded mammal, i'm coming down with the flu. but work awaits, work always awaits.

diary four

last day of november, the coldest november in 25 years. merry jolly december tomorrow.
already got my 2011 friends calendar.

page 3.5

want to escape britain for the royal wedding, i know the event would be good for tourism and crap like that and since there are tons of other television channels, it's likely i could miss the live coverage. but the papers would be all over it and i love reading the newsprints in the UK. i don't even have to buy one to satisfy my cravings for news and features, there are a lot of free readings on the go in this side of the northern hemisphere, especially in london.

however, i know william is a stellar royal. but all these commotions in marrying a sloane seem a hollow enterprise. hopefully ths union of hearts would improve the economic outlook of the world.

seconds

don't really have the time to watch the X Factor or any reality show on ITV, or any programs on ITV. but a few people at work do follow the X Factor and it's a conversation piece to cover up the lulls and navigate the ebb and flow of working life. the contestants themselves are featured in the papers every day, so it doesn't seem i'm missing much. i just hope the winner will turn out to be like leona lewis or alexandra burke, overtake cheryl cole in the fame category, write in-depth songs that touch the soul, rely on sheer talent not a viable image.

minus temp

the coats in display are rather picturesque. the different array of scarves, jackets, bonnets, mittens certainly makes winter cozy, paints a kodak moment. it's going to snow first before i clear out the garden of unwanted weeds. but time off work is a luxury. plus all i want to do is snooze every waking moment.

sharpen

a resplendent sunday afternoon. much to my chagrin, i'm reading slower than my usual pace.

friday evening at the west end

dinner at Nando's, which has empty tables to our surprise. after that, a short walk towards the Noel Coward Theatre for Deathtrap. it was a fantastic few hours. the play was superb, enjoyed it tremendously.

re-type

it's snowing in some parts of england, though not in london, which is a good thing as i have yet to trim the weeds in front of the kitchen. my brother and his family up north are experiencing a foot of snow, urging the hubby to quip, "ring your brother, make sure they're alright."

they're fine. the car wouldn't run and the kids are screaming in the background. brad wants playdoh for Christmas. it's the start of the festive season and it might turn out to be a very white Christmas.

COYS!

from the heavenly winning moments to coming back down to earth in a 1-0 loss to Wigan at home, loss to West Ham away, draw to Everton at home, loss to Bolton away, draw to Sunderland on a chilly evening match. then there are the too many to mention injuries -- can't wait for ledley to come back.

spurs check

trapped

catching thy breath, blogging, replenishing the myriad of missing texts in these pages, writing about nothing and the weather, time is of the essence. although i have difficulty relating to some brand of women-talk from the home country during lunch hour. what if charice pempengco not featured in the glee concert at the O2? would that make it less interesting? a good singing voice is a good singing voice. but a few fags here and there could stifle the gift of angelic melody like what happened to charlotte church. one throat surgery and one is suddenly like julie andrews. i'm not saying that charice will end up like whitney houston. but am i really on speaking terms with people whose outlook are pretty limited?

on the same lunch hour note, is nationalism about skin-whitening creams? do us filipinos have to embrace the lack of melanin amongst caucasians? the spanish colonial period were a hundred and twelve years ago and the americans had left in 1946, the bases treaty was rejected in 1991 but colonial mentality prevails. we have to appreciate our own skin (color). i know we join the diaspora, we work, travel. but not integrating and not widening our notions and horizons stifle the progress of our identity. however people set in their ways and beliefs are hard to bend. nevertheless, there are the soft-spoken and more humble ones, not so much ingrained in domesticity. they go outside the box, leave the push chairs at home and carry their babies close to their skin.